Last week, an article appeared in my feed that suggested that along with the other stereotypes that we have – jeans rolled up worn with Converse (guilty, though it’s got more to do with me being short), that we can’t sit on chairs (?!?!) and we can’t do maths (I also beg to differ) – that the cake of choice for bisexuals is… Lemon bars.
I admit, I am not a fan of a stereotype anyway – the last thing I want to be, ever, is the same as everyone else. But actually, lemon bars are pretty damn good. I’m not a massive brownie or chocolate cake fan. I love a good carrot cake, bu they’re not always an option, and vanilla is… Vanilla. I can appreciate it, but I often long for something a little bit more than vanilla – even with sprinkles.
But a lemon bar. Lemon bars are a little bit of everything. Biscuity base, squidgy cakey top, tart and sweet all at the same time. I admit, as you’ll see in the recipe I make them squidgier than most, by adding a spoon of lemon curd, so they really do go soft and creamy and now I’m wishing I hadn’t eaten them all and had some left.
With this revelation from the internet, that meant of course that I had to pull a recipe together formally. So a test bake this weekend has gone down rather well. They’re incredibly easy to make, and you could always play with variations – switching our lemon for lime, or orange, blood orange, maybe even grapefruit if you were feeling fancy.
There are, as ever, a couple of tips for this recipe – one is the cooling of the base. This is a properly buttery shortbread base, and so the longer you leave it to cool before adding the topping, the more biscuity it will be. Add the topping hot for it to be really squidgy as a whole, let it cool completely for a more firm biscuit base.
The second tip is lining the tray with greaseproof paper. The topping sticks – even with a non stick pan, you’ll still get crusty bits. Now of course, you could ignore me, then you have the treat of picking and eating the chewy crusty bits from the edge, and indeed trimming the outside (and eating those bits too) so you have neat edges. But a proper paper lined tin will mean you can easily lift the whole thing from the tin, no effort required.
I hope you enjoy these tart little treats as much as I do.

Zesty Lemon Bars
Ingredients
For the base:
- 110 grams Plain flour
- 1 Lemon, zested (save the juice for the filling!)
- 50 grams Caster sugar
- 115 grams Butter, cubed and softened
- Pinch of salt
For the topping
- 1 tbsp Lemon curd
- 2 Medium Eggs
- 120 ml Lemon juice
- 20 grams Self raising flour
- 150 grams Caster sugar
Instructions
To make the base
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Preheat the oven to 180°C (Gas Mark 4), and line a 22cm baking tin with greaseproof paper.
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Add all the base ingredients to a bowl, and crumble the mixture in your fingers until everything is mixed and it resembled breadcrumbs. Slowly start to bring it together into a ball.
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Put the mixture in the tin, and press it down to form a single, even layer. It doesn't have to be perfect, you're going to top it anyway!
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Bake in the oven for 20-25 minutes, until it starts to turn golden on the top. Depending on how squidgy you want your bars, let it cool completely, or move on to the topping straight away.
For the topping:
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Add everything to a bowl and mix it together until it's evenly combined.
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Pour over the base, and pop back into the oven. Bake for another 20-25 minutes, until it just sets, then remove from the oven.
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Let it cool in the tin, and then when it's cool to touch, cover and refrigerate for an hour or so. This will make it easier to cut. Slice and serve.

